It's been an exciting week in our house as Jackson has prayed to ask Jesus to forgive his sins and ask Jesus to live in his heart.
For several months, Jackson has been making comments about asking Jesus to live in his heart. They were side comments here and there and sometimes we'd talk about it a little bit, but they didn't lead to anything much deeper. More recently though, he was being more persistent and intentional. It didn't take long to realize that things were stirring in Jackson's heart and so we sought out guidance and counsel for our pastor.
Pastor took Jackson out of class one day this week to talk with him. Later that day, Pastor met with us and told us that he was very impressed with Jackson's knowledge of sin, forgiveness, baptism. In that meeting, Jackson prayed with Pastor that all of his sins would be forgiven.
We are undoubtedly thrilled and excited for this moment and that we have such a wonderful church and pastor who prayed with us for Jackson when he was not even a day old in the hospital and again later that year when we dedicated him before the church. Not to mention, he's our neighbor, so he puts up with our occasional drop-in to say hi!
To be completely honest, I really struggled with wanting Jackson to let this go and for it to resurface again in a year or two. I guess I just was wanting him to be older. He certainly has a large knowledge base of the Christian faith from being in church multiple times each week and attending a Christian school. I trust him that he believes that what he knows is true. However, I know that he does not have vast knowledge of other faiths and belief systems and therefore he can't choose Christianity over those things yet. But I came upon two very big realizations in this process:
- It is critical for me to step aside and follow Jackson's lead regarding the issues that are between him and God. Far be it from me to deny any of my children what God has placed on their heart simply because of expectations I've set forth in my mind.
- Even at 31, I find that I must continually choose Jesus in my life. I have a mind that enjoys asking questions with an open mind, reading research, obtaining outside opinions and coming to my own conclusions in everything from hobbies, education, and even my faith. I don't believe this tendency means that I lack faith, but instead, gives me the opportunity to solidify my faith. I have become convicted in that I need to be transparent in these processes with my children and stand along side them as they work through things themselves.
- I guess there is a third-- This started out as a post to talk about Jackson and what he has learned-- and it's ending with all that he has been teaching me lately, like mainly, to have a faith like a child that Scripture mandates us to have!
So Jackson asked Jesus into his heart this week. We've been celebrating lots. We waiting to make his public profession at church this evening so that Derek could be there. We have all been so encouraged by so many friends and family!